My dinghy-ling

I got a dinghy for my birthday which - next to my bicycle Ms. Mango Perry - is the greatest thing that's happened to me in the last 2 weeks.
The maiden voyage turned out to be a bit of a gong show however, as one might expect.
To begin with we have no pump and after tracking one down, we discover that a regular pump does not work with out a great deal of effort. So we did what any construction daughters would do and used an air compressor. Once inflated (hours after we'd hoped to be on the water) we proceeded to jam this huge inflated boat into a mini Honda Civic.
Between Kris and I we managed to shoulder check on both sides and shift gears, but it was so small feat with a huge inflated boat cramming our necks and heads out our respective windows. Finally, at the water, we discover we've failed to bring the paddles. After this much effort leaving to go home was out of the questions.
Fortunately after a passionate conversation with my family in which my grandmother assure me "zat it doesn't matter how good a svimmer you are - you vill die vis out a lifechacket and vat voul ve do if you died!?" to which I replied "you'd be fine" to which my mom responded with tears, she actually cried and said, "no! I would never be fine". Long story short, at least we had life jackets. We felt safe.
So we pushed off from shore and began a delightful Huckleberry Finn-esque voyage down the great Saskatchewan River.
By the time we'd passed under the Idylwyld bridge we'd polished off the sangria and realized we were on the wrong side of the river to get out of the water at the Mendel. So - without paddles - we took turns kicking off the back of the dinghy like the most ridiculous Flinstone style motor boat you've ever seen. It was good for a laugh. No small feat though, and I'm feeling it in my inner thighs today boy.
Anyway - we narrowly missed the weir, pulled up at the Mendel unscathed and proved our mothers wrong. The river is a perfectly safe place to spend a sunny afternoon.
Unfortunately Sheila my biznatchy Sunfire has all kinds of poky things in her ass because we punctured a huge hole in the dinghy! What a mess.
Of course we always have duct tape...