Three's the charm

I broke three pairs of sunglasses in one week! One pair spontaneously combusted in my purse, one pair I sat on - and the other pair miraculously appeared in my bed (under my knee)! You'd think at least I had a really steamy story to justify the latter, but I really honestly cannot imagine how a pair of sunglasses appeared under the covers in my made bed. I never even make my bed! Maybe it was sabotage.
All I know is that I have one pair without a second stem, one pair with a cracked lens, and one with a cracked frame, and so I've been wearing the ones with the cracked frame and I feel like I am mentally retarded. People look at me and point. They whisper to each other "Does that girl know her lens is cracked?" (Uh, yeah! It pinches.) It's too bad, but I can't seem to justify risking a forth pair in the span of eight days. That's preposterous.
So that's my story. You can tell my life is reaching an unprecedented low as I've resorted to stomping on my eye wear to spice up my life. I guess I'm not as interesting as I allow myself to believe. Pretty soon I'll just lieing instead - at least it will spice up this blog too.